i'm tired.

it seems as though no matter where i go, bullshit follows. and the less i do, and the more i try to behave, the worse it gets. i'm freakin tired of this garbage, man.

and its always people that do not know me. and they make me feel as though i am doing something wrong, and i don't deserve to feel that way. i haven't done anything to deserve feeling badly about myself. i'm tired of it.

is it toO much to ask for everyone [everyone that doesn't love me, that is] to keep my name out of their mouths?

if i had realized that growing up meant having to act "professionally", even when no one else around you seems to be, i'd have considered becoming an actress.